Goodness, it's been quite a few days since my last post! How'd that happen? I suppose life got in the way, as usual! :) Don't get me wrong - there were definitely a couple of things at least that I thought, "Hey! I should do a blog about that!" but just never put action behind the thought. Like the day I put new sandals on Anna with no socks and she rubbed blisters on both feet that bled like crazy? She never cried about it or anything - was too enamored with her first experience with a banana freezer pop, I suppose. But needless to say, I was totally consumed with guilt over her poor little feet! Or the day that Noah used the phrase "Heck no!" at supper? Or the day that we all went to the park and totally enjoyed the amazingly beautiful weather? Yep, that was the day that Noah turned to me and said, "Mommy, does this park have grass?" [the playground area is "fenced" in with landscape timbers and filled with wood chippings] I said, "Sure it does, right over there!" To which he replied, "Great 'cause I gotta pee!" and proceeded to run over there, pulling down his britches... Thankfully, Greg was quicker than Noah and scooped him up before we could get fined for public exposure or something and carried him to the bathroom. I had been telling Gregory for months that letting Noah "water the grass" at our house would come back to bite him in the behind one day!
And there were serious blogs to write, too. Blogs about how sad we were that some dear friends of ours have decided to move on and won't be at Hope Fellowship with us anymore. That caused a rough few days, let me tell you! The Sullivan household was a sad place, until we got our arms around the fact that God was truly leading them into bigger and better things and that we really have to let them go to follow where He's leading. But it still hurt! Other blogs that didn't get written were about my struggles with Medifast. Not very many (I'm still on plan, amazingly! Thank You, Lord!) but they're there, nonetheless. My struggles over having lots of moodiness and irritability with my husband (which he attributes to the soy in the medifast products). He hasn't asked me to stop the diet (well, he did threaten to hide my supplies one day!) but I have been thinking about it and praying about it. I just hate to stop when I'm having success, and am hoping that now that I realize I'm more irritable and moody than normal, that I can combat it and it won't be as much of an issue. Hopefully.
So now, I'm up to date. Kind of. And of course have totally forgotten what the actual purpose of this blog was going to be! Figures...
Friday, March 26, 2010
Friday, March 12, 2010
My Sweet Husband and His First Love
My sweet husband posted the nicest post on his blog in honor of our four year anniversary yesterday. (Check it out here.) He's such a huge romantic at heart! He tries to come across as a gruff bear sometimes (and does in fact succeed at that at times!) but in reality, he's just a big cuddly teddy bear.
I love the fact that he's not ashamed to talk openly about his feelings and that he's not ashamed to cry. When he tears up, it always wrecks me. Especially when he's singing and worshipping. He'll get quiet and I'll glance over to see him communing with the Father and it totally wrecks me every time. It reminds me why I love him so much. Why we're still together - even with all our rocky times and ups and downs (it's been a wild four years, let me tell you!). We're together because I'm not his first love. His first love redeemed him from the pit about 18 years ago and turned his life around. His first love didn't care about his past, but saw the promise and the potential in him that I see. His first love is still the One he turns to when things get hard... and I wouldn't have it any other way. Because his first love is my first love, too - my beloved Jesus. He's definitely the glue that holds us together. Without Him, who knows where either of us would be.
It's hard to believe that it's only been four years ago that we said "I do". Sometimes it seems like we've known each other forever - we are soul mates and I firmly believe that God intended for us to be husband and wife - that He foreordained our union from before the foundations of the world. All the stuff that we went through to get to March 11, 2006, was preparation for our lives today. All the yuckiness of my first marriage. All the pain of Greg's first wife's fight with cancer. All those things made us who we are. Made us appreciate what we have together. One would hope that we would appreciate it enough so that we wouldn't fight... not the case yet, but we are pressing on toward that goal! And I have to say that our fights are fewer and farther between than they used to be. (Thank You, Lord, for that!) But I suppose that's what happens when you have two very passionate individuals, trying to learn to live together and trying to learn to be parents at the ripe old ages we are. It's a good thing that God's grace is sufficient - we need large daily doses of it to see us through.
So sitting here, four years later, do I have any insights or flashes of wisdom about where God's going to take us in the next four years? Nope, not at all. But I do know this: that I love my husband more today than I did at the beginning. That I'm more committed to him than I would have thought possible, that I want to be by his side no matter what comes our way, and that we're in this 'til death do us part. No, Gregory's not my first love. But I'll bet if you asked him, he'd have the same response that I did - he wouldn't have it any other way.
I love the fact that he's not ashamed to talk openly about his feelings and that he's not ashamed to cry. When he tears up, it always wrecks me. Especially when he's singing and worshipping. He'll get quiet and I'll glance over to see him communing with the Father and it totally wrecks me every time. It reminds me why I love him so much. Why we're still together - even with all our rocky times and ups and downs (it's been a wild four years, let me tell you!). We're together because I'm not his first love. His first love redeemed him from the pit about 18 years ago and turned his life around. His first love didn't care about his past, but saw the promise and the potential in him that I see. His first love is still the One he turns to when things get hard... and I wouldn't have it any other way. Because his first love is my first love, too - my beloved Jesus. He's definitely the glue that holds us together. Without Him, who knows where either of us would be.
It's hard to believe that it's only been four years ago that we said "I do". Sometimes it seems like we've known each other forever - we are soul mates and I firmly believe that God intended for us to be husband and wife - that He foreordained our union from before the foundations of the world. All the stuff that we went through to get to March 11, 2006, was preparation for our lives today. All the yuckiness of my first marriage. All the pain of Greg's first wife's fight with cancer. All those things made us who we are. Made us appreciate what we have together. One would hope that we would appreciate it enough so that we wouldn't fight... not the case yet, but we are pressing on toward that goal! And I have to say that our fights are fewer and farther between than they used to be. (Thank You, Lord, for that!) But I suppose that's what happens when you have two very passionate individuals, trying to learn to live together and trying to learn to be parents at the ripe old ages we are. It's a good thing that God's grace is sufficient - we need large daily doses of it to see us through.
So sitting here, four years later, do I have any insights or flashes of wisdom about where God's going to take us in the next four years? Nope, not at all. But I do know this: that I love my husband more today than I did at the beginning. That I'm more committed to him than I would have thought possible, that I want to be by his side no matter what comes our way, and that we're in this 'til death do us part. No, Gregory's not my first love. But I'll bet if you asked him, he'd have the same response that I did - he wouldn't have it any other way.
A Failed Kitchen Experiment
Well, we've had our first kitchen disaster since starting Medifast. We've tried lots of new veggies, experimented with different ways of cooking familiar veggies... but today's attempt to do the Roasted Kale Chips? A total and complete flop! My husband's comment: "These aren't bad, if you're in the burnt grass category." That about sums it up: burnt grass. Yuck! But I think I know the problem - the recipe I was using called for 35 minutes at 300 degrees. Unfortunately, I was trying to cook these around lunchtime while feeding my 3 year old and my 1 year old AND in the middle of a huge thunderstorm (complete with large hail) that was freaking both kids out. So I was a little distracted. Didn't think to even check the chips until there was less than 8 minutes on my timer, at which point they were already charred to a crisp. And while I wanted them crispy, this was definitely NOT what I had in mind. So I'll try again another time - a time when I can keep a closer watch on them! But it's not a total loss - I only used part of the kale I had bought, so at least I have supplies on hand to try again. Will keep you posted!
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Update on my Vision Problems
I mentioned in my last post that I was going to the ophthalmologist to see if I could find out what was going on with my eyes. About a week after I started on Medifast, suddenly my vision was extremely blurry. It was like my glasses had been misplaced with someone else's overnight. I went to the Eye Center at Walmart where the eye doctor did a brief exam and said that my prescription had changed drastically. I told him about the new diet and that I was type 2 diabetic but that my blood sugar numbers had been great since starting the diet. (Prior to starting, I had been sporadic about taking my meds and sporadic about monitoring my numbers...) He said that the blurriness was due to deposits on my eyes shifting due to the fluctuations in my glucose numbers. OK... I thought it was weird that this had never happened before, especially since I had been on an insulin pump during both of my pregnancies and had extremely tight control on my diabetes during those times in my life. So why did my vision not freak out then?
So I get the new glasses and all is well... for a couple of weeks. Suddenly (overnight again!), everything's blurry again! Not as bad as the first time, but bad enough that it freaked me out. I had mentioned this to my primary care doctor when I saw him in February when one of the kids was sick, and he had told me that he would be glad to refer me to an ophthalmologist if it happened again. So off I go yesterday to the thus referred ophthalmologist to get some answers.
The good news: it's not early stages of diabetic retinopathy (which is what I was really worried about!) and it's not an eye infection. My eyes are healthy. He basically said the same thing the other guy did: this was due to my blood sugars changing. When I asked why it hadn't happened before, he basically said that you never know when dealing with blood sugars how they're going to affect things. Hmmmmm... OK..... so is this going to keep happening?? I certainly can't afford to keep getting new glasses (although Walmart does replace the lens for free within 60 days, thank the Lord!) and I certainly don't want to keep having my life turned upside down while I wait for new glasses - I'd been afraid to drive, which left my husband the sole chauffeur for the family. And it just feels weird to walk around and not be able to see things clearly, know what I mean?
So here we are. I'm waiting for the new lens to come in (supposed to be here in 11 days - how silly is that?? so much for expedited service!) and hoping that my eyes are through with their little bouts of fluctuations. On the one hand, I'm happy that my numbers are so great and that my diabetes is under control now that I'm on Medifast! Yippee! But on the other hand, it really is sobering to think about how bad I've been for the past year since my daughter was born. My numbers were never extraordinary high or anything like that - the highest I'd had was probably mid to upper 200's (my husband on the other hand has much higher numbers than I do, but that's the subject of another blog). I had kind of taken a "oh well - everything's fine" attitude about my diabetes (and about my health in general) and was totally in denial.
Until 2010. Suddenly, it was as if a switch had been flipped. Suddenly, I was ready to change my life. No looking back - onward and upward, on to bigger (well, actually smaller!) things. Suddenly, getting healthy is a huge priority for me. Maybe this was just a little reminder that I can't just ignore my health issues and hope they go away. Not anymore. I have to get healthy for my kids. No - scratch that - I have to get healthy for ME. Yes, my children are a huge incentive. They're extremely important and I want to be around to see them grow up! But the bottom line that explains why this time it's almost easy is that I'm doing this for me. Numero Uno. I've finally reached a point in my life where it's like God is saying to me (like He said to the Israelites), "This day I put before you life and death... therefore, choose life." It really is a matter of life and death, you know? I don't mean to be overly dramatic or anything. Shoot, maybe I do! :) But it's like all these verses from the Word are floating around in my mind - about presenting my body a living sacrifice, about my body being a temple of the Holy Spirit. Obviously I haven't been treating my temple very well at all!
[That reminded me of something: A few weeks ago, a friend of ours had an analogy that I thought was awesome about our new lifestyle with Medifast. At the time, my husband was doing it with me and we were at a very informal worship service at the coffeehouse, sharing what all was going on in our lives. A friend named Michael made the comment that we were remodeling our temples, and that remodeling can get messy, especially at first! Wow - there's so much insight in that comparison! So when the going gets tough, I remind myself that sometimes before you can remodel, you have to get out the sledge hammer and do some demolition... makes it easier to "crucify my flesh"! :)]
I feel like I've been rambling overly much in this post, but so be it. I tend to type like I talk, and I ramble lots and lots when I talk. But the bottom line is that I'm in this for the long haul. I can't wait until I can proudly count myself as one of the folks on here that have reached goal and kept it off for years and years. And I will reach my goal. Oh yes! That much I'm certain of - 'cause this time, I'm doing it for the right reasons.
So I get the new glasses and all is well... for a couple of weeks. Suddenly (overnight again!), everything's blurry again! Not as bad as the first time, but bad enough that it freaked me out. I had mentioned this to my primary care doctor when I saw him in February when one of the kids was sick, and he had told me that he would be glad to refer me to an ophthalmologist if it happened again. So off I go yesterday to the thus referred ophthalmologist to get some answers.
The good news: it's not early stages of diabetic retinopathy (which is what I was really worried about!) and it's not an eye infection. My eyes are healthy. He basically said the same thing the other guy did: this was due to my blood sugars changing. When I asked why it hadn't happened before, he basically said that you never know when dealing with blood sugars how they're going to affect things. Hmmmmm... OK..... so is this going to keep happening?? I certainly can't afford to keep getting new glasses (although Walmart does replace the lens for free within 60 days, thank the Lord!) and I certainly don't want to keep having my life turned upside down while I wait for new glasses - I'd been afraid to drive, which left my husband the sole chauffeur for the family. And it just feels weird to walk around and not be able to see things clearly, know what I mean?
So here we are. I'm waiting for the new lens to come in (supposed to be here in 11 days - how silly is that?? so much for expedited service!) and hoping that my eyes are through with their little bouts of fluctuations. On the one hand, I'm happy that my numbers are so great and that my diabetes is under control now that I'm on Medifast! Yippee! But on the other hand, it really is sobering to think about how bad I've been for the past year since my daughter was born. My numbers were never extraordinary high or anything like that - the highest I'd had was probably mid to upper 200's (my husband on the other hand has much higher numbers than I do, but that's the subject of another blog). I had kind of taken a "oh well - everything's fine" attitude about my diabetes (and about my health in general) and was totally in denial.
Until 2010. Suddenly, it was as if a switch had been flipped. Suddenly, I was ready to change my life. No looking back - onward and upward, on to bigger (well, actually smaller!) things. Suddenly, getting healthy is a huge priority for me. Maybe this was just a little reminder that I can't just ignore my health issues and hope they go away. Not anymore. I have to get healthy for my kids. No - scratch that - I have to get healthy for ME. Yes, my children are a huge incentive. They're extremely important and I want to be around to see them grow up! But the bottom line that explains why this time it's almost easy is that I'm doing this for me. Numero Uno. I've finally reached a point in my life where it's like God is saying to me (like He said to the Israelites), "This day I put before you life and death... therefore, choose life." It really is a matter of life and death, you know? I don't mean to be overly dramatic or anything. Shoot, maybe I do! :) But it's like all these verses from the Word are floating around in my mind - about presenting my body a living sacrifice, about my body being a temple of the Holy Spirit. Obviously I haven't been treating my temple very well at all!
[That reminded me of something: A few weeks ago, a friend of ours had an analogy that I thought was awesome about our new lifestyle with Medifast. At the time, my husband was doing it with me and we were at a very informal worship service at the coffeehouse, sharing what all was going on in our lives. A friend named Michael made the comment that we were remodeling our temples, and that remodeling can get messy, especially at first! Wow - there's so much insight in that comparison! So when the going gets tough, I remind myself that sometimes before you can remodel, you have to get out the sledge hammer and do some demolition... makes it easier to "crucify my flesh"! :)]
I feel like I've been rambling overly much in this post, but so be it. I tend to type like I talk, and I ramble lots and lots when I talk. But the bottom line is that I'm in this for the long haul. I can't wait until I can proudly count myself as one of the folks on here that have reached goal and kept it off for years and years. And I will reach my goal. Oh yes! That much I'm certain of - 'cause this time, I'm doing it for the right reasons.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Bye Bye Mr. Scale! Plus Hot Cocoa, the Biggest Loser, and My Eyes...
Well, I have made a momentous decision. I'm packing away my scale until next Tuesday. Actually, I'm having my husband pack away my scale - I'd give in long before then, I'm sure! You see, even though my health coach advised against it, I've been a daily weigher from the beginning. And we're not talking about just once a day, either - oh, no! Several times a day. Against all reason! Right after finishing a meal, when I know it's going to be up! I mean, c'mon - what's up with that thinking?? So this morning I decided that I wasn't going to let those little numbers influence my day any more. I saw a thread on the discussion boards about giving up weighing until Easter - I know I'd never make it that long! But I think I can hold off for a week at a time... maybe. We'll see. My husband is pretty ruthless about it (or at least is threatening to be!) so it's pretty much out of my hands. Unless I get truly desparate and sneak to a friend's house to weigh on their scales? No, no, no. The madness stops here and now!
On a totally different note, I had the best hot cocoa with sf raspberry syrup tonight. I tried making the cocoa with just a little water at first to make sure I got all the lumps out (a handy little tip from the boards - thanks to whoever suggested it!) and then added more water & syrup and nuked. Ever so yummy! I think that's my new favorite - especially since we had snow once again here in northwest Georgia today. Not sure what's up with the crazy weather, but it definitely made me want to curl up with a steaming mug of chocolately goodness! Mmmmmmmmm.....
And on another totally different note, is anyone else an avid watcher of the Biggest Loser? This is the first season I've ever watched it but I'm hooked. It's a big deal at our house, mainly because we have to commandeer the TV away from our three year old for the night. But since this is the first reality show I've watched in a while, it amazes me how into it I get!! I mean, I'm rooting for these folks like they're my best friend! And the fact that we're all in this "getting healthy NOW" mode probably contributes a lot to that. I actually yelped and cheered when the black team managed to beat out the blue team tonight, against amazing odds. Noah thought I'd lost my mind! I mean, there was no sword fighting going on, no spaceships, no dancing, no singing, nothing to him that would warrant any such goings on. But he just shook his head and went back to playing. Silly mommy!
My last and totally final different note for the night: I go to the eye doctor tomorrow to see what's causing all this blurred vision. It started right after I started on Medifast, which really freaked me out! I don't think it's related, but it will be a relief to know what's going on. So say a prayer for me, if you think about it, that the doctor will know what the deal is and have a ready solution!
On a totally different note, I had the best hot cocoa with sf raspberry syrup tonight. I tried making the cocoa with just a little water at first to make sure I got all the lumps out (a handy little tip from the boards - thanks to whoever suggested it!) and then added more water & syrup and nuked. Ever so yummy! I think that's my new favorite - especially since we had snow once again here in northwest Georgia today. Not sure what's up with the crazy weather, but it definitely made me want to curl up with a steaming mug of chocolately goodness! Mmmmmmmmm.....
And on another totally different note, is anyone else an avid watcher of the Biggest Loser? This is the first season I've ever watched it but I'm hooked. It's a big deal at our house, mainly because we have to commandeer the TV away from our three year old for the night. But since this is the first reality show I've watched in a while, it amazes me how into it I get!! I mean, I'm rooting for these folks like they're my best friend! And the fact that we're all in this "getting healthy NOW" mode probably contributes a lot to that. I actually yelped and cheered when the black team managed to beat out the blue team tonight, against amazing odds. Noah thought I'd lost my mind! I mean, there was no sword fighting going on, no spaceships, no dancing, no singing, nothing to him that would warrant any such goings on. But he just shook his head and went back to playing. Silly mommy!
My last and totally final different note for the night: I go to the eye doctor tomorrow to see what's causing all this blurred vision. It started right after I started on Medifast, which really freaked me out! I don't think it's related, but it will be a relief to know what's going on. So say a prayer for me, if you think about it, that the doctor will know what the deal is and have a ready solution!
Monday, March 1, 2010
Noah's New Prayer
Tonight before supper, the kids were playing in the living room. Greg was on his computer and I was in the kitchen getting things ready. Anna Grace is at the stage where anything Noah has, she wants. She also has started hitting Noah, usually inadvertently I think, but sometimes not.
Well, tonight, he took a toy away from her earlier and she had decided she wanted it back. So she came over to get it and apparently hauled off and hit him in the arm. Noah exclaimed, "Hey! Sister hit me!" And then before either one of us could say anything or admonish her or anything, he began to pray, "Lord Jesus, help Anna not to hit me anymore. In Jesus' name, Amen."
I feel like this is HUGE! This is the first time he's prayed spontaneously like that, other than for healing. He's used to praying when someone is hurt or sick and doesn't think a thing about it - just goes up and lays his little hand on them and prays. And he's used to praying at bedtime and before meals and all that. But this is the first time he'd ever just prayed for a situation to change, know what I mean? It really made me feel like, hey - maybe... just maybe... we're doing OK as parents. Maybe we really are training him up the way we're supposed to. Most of the time, all I see are the things I'm doing wrong. The areas where I know I'm missing it. So tonight it warmed my heart to know that in spite of all my mistakes and all the things I'm not doing very well, he is learning and he is drawing closer to God. That's been my prayer for him all along - that he know God and love Him beyond all else. That he will be totally ravished by the Heavenly Father and that he will long to worship him all the days of his life.
Thank You, Lord, for little glimpses like this that reassure this mother's heart that we're at least pointing him in the right direction! :) Thank You for honoring my prayers for him... and for honoring his prayers, too! {Anna Grace didn't hit him anymore tonight - that's an answer to prayer for sure!}
Well, tonight, he took a toy away from her earlier and she had decided she wanted it back. So she came over to get it and apparently hauled off and hit him in the arm. Noah exclaimed, "Hey! Sister hit me!" And then before either one of us could say anything or admonish her or anything, he began to pray, "Lord Jesus, help Anna not to hit me anymore. In Jesus' name, Amen."
I feel like this is HUGE! This is the first time he's prayed spontaneously like that, other than for healing. He's used to praying when someone is hurt or sick and doesn't think a thing about it - just goes up and lays his little hand on them and prays. And he's used to praying at bedtime and before meals and all that. But this is the first time he'd ever just prayed for a situation to change, know what I mean? It really made me feel like, hey - maybe... just maybe... we're doing OK as parents. Maybe we really are training him up the way we're supposed to. Most of the time, all I see are the things I'm doing wrong. The areas where I know I'm missing it. So tonight it warmed my heart to know that in spite of all my mistakes and all the things I'm not doing very well, he is learning and he is drawing closer to God. That's been my prayer for him all along - that he know God and love Him beyond all else. That he will be totally ravished by the Heavenly Father and that he will long to worship him all the days of his life.
Thank You, Lord, for little glimpses like this that reassure this mother's heart that we're at least pointing him in the right direction! :) Thank You for honoring my prayers for him... and for honoring his prayers, too! {Anna Grace didn't hit him anymore tonight - that's an answer to prayer for sure!}
Roasted Turnips, A Goal Met, and Cravings for Chocolate...
Well, tonight we tried another new veggie for us: roasted turnips. They were actually much better than I was expecting! My husband's comment was that they were like potatoes, but a little sweeter. One thing I didn't do but that I had read somewhere was to soak the turnips in milk first to take some of the bitterness away? We were out of milk so I skipped that step... but they turned out pretty good regardless.
I feel so adventurous, experimenting with all these vegetables! They may not be new and exotic veggies to some, but to our little family, eating veggies this often in the past was a foreign concept!
Tomorrow's my weigh in day! Since I am somewhat a daily weigher (I know, know - that's bad, but I just can't resist!), I think I've met my next mini-goal of 20 lbs! I hope I'm not jinxing myself by celebrating early, since it ain't official 'til in the morning, but this morning the scale showed a loss of 3.2 lbs since last Tuesday, making my grand total 21.8 lbs! Hallellujah and praise God!! This was a huge goal for me on many levels - one being that it will mean I'm only 1.2 lbs away from 217, which is the smallest I've been since meeting my husband. And the other is the fact that my reward for meeting this goal was getting my hair highlighted and cut... something it is in dire need of! It looks bad enough that a beautician stopped me at the mall a few weeks ago and gave me her card, saying, "I noticed you needed some color work done..." LOL
You know the weird thing, though? Even with this mini-goal met, I've been rather down today and last night. Don't know why, but have been wanting chocolate - purely emotional eating, I know. And I haven't succombed - but the desire is there. But that's OK - I'll just drink some more water and have a chocolate shake here in a bit and remind myself of how great I've been feeling these past 7 weeks and of how great I'm going to feel as I get healthier and thinner! Being thin isn't going to magically make everything in my world right and make me happy all the time or solve all the world's problems or bring about peace and harmony in the universe... but I can't wait until I'm there, nonetheless!
I feel so adventurous, experimenting with all these vegetables! They may not be new and exotic veggies to some, but to our little family, eating veggies this often in the past was a foreign concept!
Tomorrow's my weigh in day! Since I am somewhat a daily weigher (I know, know - that's bad, but I just can't resist!), I think I've met my next mini-goal of 20 lbs! I hope I'm not jinxing myself by celebrating early, since it ain't official 'til in the morning, but this morning the scale showed a loss of 3.2 lbs since last Tuesday, making my grand total 21.8 lbs! Hallellujah and praise God!! This was a huge goal for me on many levels - one being that it will mean I'm only 1.2 lbs away from 217, which is the smallest I've been since meeting my husband. And the other is the fact that my reward for meeting this goal was getting my hair highlighted and cut... something it is in dire need of! It looks bad enough that a beautician stopped me at the mall a few weeks ago and gave me her card, saying, "I noticed you needed some color work done..." LOL
You know the weird thing, though? Even with this mini-goal met, I've been rather down today and last night. Don't know why, but have been wanting chocolate - purely emotional eating, I know. And I haven't succombed - but the desire is there. But that's OK - I'll just drink some more water and have a chocolate shake here in a bit and remind myself of how great I've been feeling these past 7 weeks and of how great I'm going to feel as I get healthier and thinner! Being thin isn't going to magically make everything in my world right and make me happy all the time or solve all the world's problems or bring about peace and harmony in the universe... but I can't wait until I'm there, nonetheless!
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Road Trip, New Bible Study, and First Goal Met!
Today we drove down to Powder Springs for Grammie's Retirement/Birthday party. Basically a 2 hour drive from our house. Not terribly bad, but with two kids, one of which is just learning the phrase "are we there yet?" and the other who was fighting sleep the entire time? Not my idea of a fun two hours! The picture of Greg was on the way down, fairly early in our trek. By the time we got home tonight, if he'd had hair, he would have pulled it out. I do have hair, but decided to forego pulling any of it out, although the urge was definitely there!
On the way down, we listened to Paper Tongues (to get us hyper and happy - love the song "Ride to California"!), some old Derek Webb and a little Caedmon's Call. It's a good thing Gregory doesn't mind me singing along at the top of my lungs - my singing voice is no where near on par with his! But my exuberance surely must count for something. Noah played air guitar and air drum occasionally, when he wasn't playing with his Star Wars figurines, and Anna Grace would chime in with various sound effects sprinkled throughout. Her "singing" is quite interesting to say the least!
It was a nice retirement/birthday party. Lots of yummy party food there, including some delicious looking punch, chips & dip, fruit with fruit dip, and lots of little finger sandwiches... and one big 'ol cake, smack dab in the middle of the table. I had prepared myself to withstand the onslaught of temptation by eating a Medifast Peanut Butter Crunch bar before we left Grammie's to walk over to her friends house for the get together. And I stayed busy with the kids and with socializing while at the party to keep from partaking. At one point, I resorted to serving other folks their cake and fetching an elderly lady some coffee to keep it from being too obvious that I wasn't eating. Didn't want it to be a big deal and offend the hostess or anything, you know? But I definitely considered it a victory that I didn't even sample anything... thankfully, Grammie and Greg fed the kids so I didn't have to endure that! :)
We had intended to go to the Percolator Coffeehouse tonight for Bible Study on the way home and to visit with our friends who congregate there on Saturday nights. But by the time we got to Summerville, we had two very tired kids and two very tired adults. Neither kid had napped worth much of anything at all today, so they were a trifle grumpy. We did stop by my folks house for a potty break and ended up eating supper with them and staying for a little bit, which was nice because that made the kids happy and gave the two tired adults a respite!
One good thing about not making it to the Coffeehouse was the fact that we made it home by 8:00 and got Anna in bed fairly close to her bedtime. Which means that with Noah happily playing, Mommy and Daddy get to relax at home and just veg for a while. Thank You, Lord!
I do hate that we missed the Bible Study, though, because it sounded extremely interesting! They were beginning a series on the feasts in the Old Testament, explaining them in greater detail. That's a subject I don't know much about but am very fascinated with. Growing up, it wasn't a subject that I ever really remember anyone talking about at all, other than a passing phrase here or there. But several of our friends celebrate them and the celebration adds such a richness to their faith. The first time I went to a Passover Seder, I was amazed and intrigued by how the ancient customs that Jesus celebrated Himself were all interwoven with His life and death. So I was really looking forward to learning more tonight.
Hopefully, we can make it down there for the Study next week... Summerville's not that far away or anything, but getting anywhere on a regular basis for us these days isn't easy! But maybe it'll happen... I can hope, right?
And even though it's not official, I met my first mini-goal of my weight loss journey - 20 lbs lost!! Hallelujah!!!!! It won't be official until Tuesday on my weigh-in day, but this morning my scale showed a loss of 21.6 lbs. Needless to say, I was excited! My excitement was increased by the fact that this means I get my first "reward": getting my hair cut and/or colored. I've been in dire need of something for weeks now, but was holding off since that was good incentive to stay on plan. Whew! Now I can finally get something done! Thank You, Lord!! :)
Friday, February 26, 2010
Zucchini Curls - Oh my goodness...
Tried a new recipe tonight that I got from the MF Discussion Boards - Zucchini Curls. Oh my goodness, how divine! Whoever came up with recipe, thank you, thank you, thank you! I wasn't sure whether we'd like them so I only made enough for me and Greg to have basically one serving each. I then ended up keeping most of them myself - at first because I didn't think he'd like them and then once I'd tasted them, it was sheer greediness. I admit that quite freely.
Greg started MF with me back in January but keeps going off for one thing and then another. He was doing really good this week - had started back on plan on Tuesday and was pretty much sticking to it. Not 100% on plan, but not terribly bad, either. But then this afternoon, despite my attempts to get him to eat a Medifast bar (even taking one to the store with us and offering it to him twice while we were out - going above and beyond in my opinion), he didn't eat anything until we got home, was "starving" and thus ate not one but TWO peanut butter sandwiches plus a boatload of chips. So therefore I didn't want to share my yummy lean and green with him tonight at all! But I did. Tried to be encouraging and supportive and all that. But I'm finding it hard to know when he wants me to push him and when not to. When to be encouraging, and when to just shut up and let him eat what he wants... there's a fine line between "encouraging" and "nagging", really, when you think about it. Especially on something like this. Part of me wants to do the tough love stuff... kind of like Jillian Michaels on The Biggest Loser, ya know? Kick his booty into shape! LOL - that's really not my style at all. And I know that he beats himself up after he goes off the plan - starts feeling guilty and feeling like he's a quitter and all sorts of crazy things like that. *Sigh* Communication between spouses is difficult enough at times without adding something as volatile as diets and lifestyle changes to it! So... didn't intend to say all that, but there you go. Definitely a prayer request or four in there, so please say one for us regarding this next time you talk to your Heavenly Father! I know it's the subject of quite a few conversations between me and God and will probably be the subject of many more in the days to come.
Anyway... back to those zucchini curls - they truly rocked! They were good enough that he actually requested that I make them again really soon. So I think I will... the next test will be whether the kids will eat them. We'll see.
Greg started MF with me back in January but keeps going off for one thing and then another. He was doing really good this week - had started back on plan on Tuesday and was pretty much sticking to it. Not 100% on plan, but not terribly bad, either. But then this afternoon, despite my attempts to get him to eat a Medifast bar (even taking one to the store with us and offering it to him twice while we were out - going above and beyond in my opinion), he didn't eat anything until we got home, was "starving" and thus ate not one but TWO peanut butter sandwiches plus a boatload of chips. So therefore I didn't want to share my yummy lean and green with him tonight at all! But I did. Tried to be encouraging and supportive and all that. But I'm finding it hard to know when he wants me to push him and when not to. When to be encouraging, and when to just shut up and let him eat what he wants... there's a fine line between "encouraging" and "nagging", really, when you think about it. Especially on something like this. Part of me wants to do the tough love stuff... kind of like Jillian Michaels on The Biggest Loser, ya know? Kick his booty into shape! LOL - that's really not my style at all. And I know that he beats himself up after he goes off the plan - starts feeling guilty and feeling like he's a quitter and all sorts of crazy things like that. *Sigh* Communication between spouses is difficult enough at times without adding something as volatile as diets and lifestyle changes to it! So... didn't intend to say all that, but there you go. Definitely a prayer request or four in there, so please say one for us regarding this next time you talk to your Heavenly Father! I know it's the subject of quite a few conversations between me and God and will probably be the subject of many more in the days to come.
Anyway... back to those zucchini curls - they truly rocked! They were good enough that he actually requested that I make them again really soon. So I think I will... the next test will be whether the kids will eat them. We'll see.
So for those of you interested in the recipe, here 'tis:
2 zucchini, unpeeled
chicken broth
lf cream cheese
Cut strips from the zucchini with a veggie peeler, down to the seeds (don't put the seedy core in 'cause it will get mushy). Put about 1/8 cup of chicken broth in a pan. Once it gets hot, add the zucchini and cook for about 3 minutes, stirring fairly often. Add the cream cheese and salt & pepper, stirring 'til the cheese is melted. Eat immediately...
I was thinking about trying it with the french onion laughing cow sometime in the future maybe?
If you try it, let me know if you enjoyed it as much as we did!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
My Plans? Not Anymore...
A friend of mine on Facebook just posted this quote as her update: "Some people are reluctant to trust God completely with their lives, fearing that He may want to make a change in their plans. Yes, He will change our plans. His plans are infinitely better than the very best we could ever conceive."
I thought that was so awesome. And so timely for me. Tonight I got to chat on FB with my ex brother-in-law and then a little later with my current sister-in-law, too. My bro-in-law had sent me the sweetest message - it totally made me cry! I haven't had the chance to catch up with him in forever, so it was great to hear how things were going with him and his family. And I don't get to see my sis-in-law very often at all (since she lives in Mississippi) and don't get to talk to her much either, so that was way way cool, too, to be able to chat with her for a bit. She's got a gift of encouragment and always says things that totally bless me, even when she herself needs encouraging.
But what really struck me tonight when I was about to sign off facebook and happened to see that quote was that God took my plans from the past and totally screwed them up! Back then, I had goals and plans and visions of where I wanted to be in 5 or 10 years. Maybe nothing concrete, but at least a general picture in my head of how my life would look and who I'd be with for the rest of my life and all that. But all that changed in an instant (well, not really - divorces take longer than that!). But everything did change with one phrase - when I asked my then-husband where he'd been and he replied, "On a date". It was definitely an ephiphany moment. I felt a knot in my chest and yet like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders, all at the same time. It was like God stuck His finger in the quiet little pond that was my life and stirred up a maelstrom.
And now? Wow - I never knew I could be so happy. The plans He had for me were truly better than the very best I could have come up with. I'm almost speechless thinking about that! All the time, He had this amazing life for me, just waiting for His timing and His moments to initiate it. Do I regret my first marriage and all the years I devoted to it? Nope - they helped make me the person I am today. Do I wish God had started my new life a little sooner? Definitely - being a mom of toddlers at 39 can be VERY tiring! :)
So here I am, headed who knows where, with a new (well, four years new!) marriage to a wonderful man and two amazingly wonderful kids. Do I have any idea where we'll be in five years? Or ten? No clue whatsoever. And that's OK. Because now I know firsthand that my life is in far more capable hands than mine. And that His plans - and His timing - is immeasurably more than I can imagine. I plan to just hang on for the ride.
I thought that was so awesome. And so timely for me. Tonight I got to chat on FB with my ex brother-in-law and then a little later with my current sister-in-law, too. My bro-in-law had sent me the sweetest message - it totally made me cry! I haven't had the chance to catch up with him in forever, so it was great to hear how things were going with him and his family. And I don't get to see my sis-in-law very often at all (since she lives in Mississippi) and don't get to talk to her much either, so that was way way cool, too, to be able to chat with her for a bit. She's got a gift of encouragment and always says things that totally bless me, even when she herself needs encouraging.
But what really struck me tonight when I was about to sign off facebook and happened to see that quote was that God took my plans from the past and totally screwed them up! Back then, I had goals and plans and visions of where I wanted to be in 5 or 10 years. Maybe nothing concrete, but at least a general picture in my head of how my life would look and who I'd be with for the rest of my life and all that. But all that changed in an instant (well, not really - divorces take longer than that!). But everything did change with one phrase - when I asked my then-husband where he'd been and he replied, "On a date". It was definitely an ephiphany moment. I felt a knot in my chest and yet like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders, all at the same time. It was like God stuck His finger in the quiet little pond that was my life and stirred up a maelstrom.
And now? Wow - I never knew I could be so happy. The plans He had for me were truly better than the very best I could have come up with. I'm almost speechless thinking about that! All the time, He had this amazing life for me, just waiting for His timing and His moments to initiate it. Do I regret my first marriage and all the years I devoted to it? Nope - they helped make me the person I am today. Do I wish God had started my new life a little sooner? Definitely - being a mom of toddlers at 39 can be VERY tiring! :)
So here I am, headed who knows where, with a new (well, four years new!) marriage to a wonderful man and two amazingly wonderful kids. Do I have any idea where we'll be in five years? Or ten? No clue whatsoever. And that's OK. Because now I know firsthand that my life is in far more capable hands than mine. And that His plans - and His timing - is immeasurably more than I can imagine. I plan to just hang on for the ride.
Monday, February 22, 2010
I am a total pushover - NOT a good thing!
Miracle of miracles! I survived a trip to Baskin Robins without partaking of any of the yummy 31 flavors! Our kids have an honorary "grammie" who was visiting for a couple of days in honor of her birthday yesterday. Well, while we were out running around today, she announces that she wants to go to BR to get ice cream for her b-day. Yes, I am a total pushover. So we went. And they had my all-time fav flavor in stock, too... Nutty Coconut. Oh my goodness.
AND to top it all off, we'd been out longer than I had anticipated and - horror of horrors! - I did NOT have a bar with me!! Even after I posted that on my profile page as one of my success tips ("Don't get caught without an emergency backup bar, blah, blah, blah..."). ARRGGH! So I'm sitting there, holding Anna as Grammie feeds her little bites of her ice cream (and yes, she got the nutty coconut). I managed to not lick the spilled ice cream off of Anna's coat as we were leaving, which was definitely a victory in my book.
So I was also a pushover at a women's meeting yesterday after church... ended up agreeing to furnish GARLIC BREAD for a spaghetti fundraising we're doing to raise money for Haiti. So even though bread's not one of my trigger foods, having to smell all that yumminess is going to be a test of my willpower. I will prevail and not partake! I guess I'm just a sucker for folks laying the pleas on thick, especially when there's a cause involved. *Sigh*
How on earth have I survived almost 40 years with no backbone? Or at best a backbone that disappears occasionally when I least expect it? I thought I had gotten much better in this regard and could say an emphatic "NO!" when I needed to, but apparently my "Needing To" Meter has been broken for a couple of days.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
My Fake Spaghetti Supper (Shiratake Noodles)
Well, I had intended to take a picture of my shiratake noodle "spaghetti" when it was still nice and neat, but totally forgot in my haste to give it a taste test. I used the noodles, Walden Farms no carb marinara, Morningstar Farms Griller Crumbles, and some diced tomatoes. It was much better than I was expecting, I must say. But I wasn't able to eat all of it. Just wasn't as appealing as some of my other lean & green meals have been. In hindsight, I shouldn't have used the full portion of crumbles allowed (2 cups - that's a bunch!) and probably shouldn't have used the full cup of noodles either. But you live and learn, right? Now I know!
And I did manage to totally avoid the chocolate cupcakes we had for Grammie's birthday. Hallelujah! A small victory? Maybe for some, but for me - HUGE!
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